Yeah, I've been having some werid experiences lately. I thought I'd share.
-To the woman in the elevator:
Please do not stare at me, it is rude. It is also unbelivably scary, you little creep. It's bad enough I have the elevator camera watching my paranoid ass everytime I get on board, why add to the claustrophobia? Perhaps because you had a boy my age who died/left you/raped you/maintained a perpetual-stare-at-you-in-an-elevator, guess what, I'm not him. Leave me the hell alone old woman. I'm not going to say start a conversation, and I'm not going to smile. So for your own vertebral sake, keep your desperate eyes off me.
-To the guy at the supermarket:
Sorry, I do not have money for a wasted piece of teen-shit like yourself (or any stranger for that matter). From your clothing, I guess you've had a troubling life, a mother who left your father for a better man, your father who left you for an easier life, a sister you abused and a dog you killed for food during midwinter. Whatever the case may be, I'm not giving you money only because you asked.
-To the Mormon assholes who knock on my door:
It's Sunday morning, did you know that? Do you bloody fools do Sundays? Because I do. Get the hell out of my face/sight/building/life, please. If you're trying to convert me, leave. You'll have a better shot with a dead Hindu. I get it, you're a couple of nice, young boys who're doing this out of stupidity or selfish gains, guess what? I don't care what you have to offer. I don't care what God wants from me, and I don't care if I'm on my way to hell. And if I am, come visit me there, because the misery just wouldn't be the same without you bastards spiritually harrassing me.
-To that dumbass customer at my workplace:
No we do not sell Thank You Cards in packets of 25 each, we don't because that's simply too god damned specific and the world doesn't revolve around your insanely unique requets. Why would any store have that... and a dollarama of all? What's next, a flying carpet?? Perhaps something stupider? Coming from you, nothing would sound too absurd I guess. And when I finally found you a pack of 20 thank you cards, you go even further with your faggotry, 'these have bells drawn on them, bells symbolize marrige' So WHAT? What the hell man? They're freaking blank, write anything on them that you want. People aren't even going to read the cliche bullcrap you're going to fill this 2-inch piece of paper with. You're a disgrace to human kind, a retarded chicken would probably be more reasonable. Whatever, I hope you die so I can leave a thank-you card at your grave.
-To my revered readers:
Please... I understand why you appear as anonymous, to rid yourself of all possible recognition and consequence. And if staying nameless makes you feel like a Marvel hero, I'm okay with that too.. but atleast let me know through an alternative method who you are. I really value your comments and I'd like to know who you are to embrace you with the gratitude you deserve for your priceless responses and feedback. Please, use a name, or atleast a pseudonym of some sort which lets me distinguish your identity. Your efforts are much appreciated.
Lots of Lav